How is this even possible? I was chatting on the phone today
with Miss Lucy, the Queen of Atomic, when we discovered that we are both fans
of The Simpsons. Miss Lucy said she had taken some of my oh-so-popular
quizzes but didn’t remember the Simpsons one. I told her I’d send it off to her
Well, I searched through all 1400 of these damn things and
guess what? No Simpsons quiz. To be sure there were quizzes dealing with all of
my other favorite things, like the Beatles, Howard Stern and at least three on Seinfeld,
but somehow the Simpson got overlooked.
And so tonight we correct this egregious oversight. After
all, I’m only here to please my readers, and if that reader happens to be a
young woman so much the better. So without any further delay allow me to
present my very first Simpsons quiz. This one, of course, goes out to Miss
Lucy. And after this build-up I’m expecting a score of nothing less than a 90%,
one is not a Simpsons character?
Air Force Amy
is Apu’s last name?
character is still alive?
Bleeding Gums Murphy
Dr. Marvin Monroe
breed of dog is Santa’s Little Helper?
many eyes did the mutated fish have?
is Lenny’s last name?
It’s never given
one is not a schoolyard bully?
character is based on Mike Tyson?
Kirk Van Houten
which program did the Simpsons originally appear?
The Carol Burnett Show
The Tracey Ullman Show
The David Letterman Show
are Itchy and Scratchy?
A cat and mouse
A dog and cat
FORCE AMY is not a character on The Simpsons. She is, however, a real-life prostitute
on one of those filthy HBO programs. And if you knew that you should be
ashamed of yourself. (Me? Oh, I just heard about her somewhere. Ahem.)
last name is NAHASAPEEMAPETILON, and thank God for copy and paste.
that quartet only FAT TONY still survives.
Little Helper is a GREYHOUND who lost his last race on Christmas Eve,
causing Homer to remark, “He’s a Simpson.”
mutated fish who swam a little too close to the nuclear power plant had
last name is LEONARD, which is a pretty strange last name. Kind of a
strange first one too, now that I think of it.
is no Simpsons character named RAGS, bully or otherwise.
TATUM is based on Tyson. He once
said of his hometown of Springfield:
“That town is a dump. If you ever see me back there again you’ll know I
f&*$#d up pretty bad.”
Simpson family first appeared on THE TRACEY ULLMAN SHOW on April 19, 1987. Ullman
later sued the program, claiming that at least part if its success was due
to it having appeared on her show. The judge is still laughing.
- Well of course you knew that Itchy and
Scratchy are a cat and a mouse. Ah, but which is which?
So how did you all do? How about you, Miss Lucy, did you get
at least nine correct? If not, you got some splainin’ to do!